The Island History

Once upon a time in a near near history, when the world of Hello! Project worshipers was still peaceful, “THEM Republic” was founded. From just a little region in The Asshat Empire, THEM Republic developed very fast and attracted wotas from many regions. The majority of wotas in The Republic at that time possessed such rare wit and humor. Occasionally they used their wit during the war against Pinkingdom; another powerful wota region and the long time rivalry of The Republic, since both regions always thought they were the rulers of the world. Both regions always spied on the other, but well, that was what EVERY region did anyway.

However, a huge anarchy occurred in The Republic and made them lose trust by many wotas who worshiped The Charming Ass. One of the most perverted of them all fled from The Republic, heading out to find a new home. Eventually, the Isle of Inventors declared their independence to the world. Most wotas on that Isle thought they invented Jpop and had the right in those so-called exclusive Jpop treasures they pirated elsewhere.

Even with such chaos, The Republic still stood strong and continued developing their region. Unfortunately, GOD never let them live peacefully. There was yet another attack on The Republic. This time they couldn’t identify the enemy and it caused troubles to those wotas. Many fled the region in panic but had no place to go, so they ended up wandering around the huge land of The Asshat Empire. Finally one ruler of the People’s Republic of assHat! idOt region, one who worshiped Troll, found out and he created a refugee camp in his region for those lost wotas out of sympathy.

After a certain time had passed, the long gone King of The Republic returned to expel their enemy and tried to retrieve his wotas back. However, some wotas couldn’t come back to their homeland and had to continue their lives in the refugee camp. One powerful wota whose named was quite famous in many regions decided that he should do something and set a journey to the sea, trying to find a new home for them. After a few days in the open water, he arrived on the shore of one deserted island. On that very day, a new region for Hello! Project worshipers was founded.

Many wotas from the refugee camp followed the one-who-is-known-as-GOD to this new land and started creating their own nation and culture.

With the known reputation of their kindness for young girls, they named their region Pedostan, after the Pedo Bear, the great animal representing the region. And their territory name was “Hello! Island”. The story during the early days of this new region and its features can be found in Pedostan : The Book of Pedo which was composed by Master Bear, Patachu, one of the wotas on that very first ship to The Island.

Like every newly found region, The Island in early days was full of wotas who fled from other regions. The wota population in the early days were the mix of different worshipers, mostly were Groper, Troll, Boobies, Pimpwolf and Loli followers. They were either bored or tired of some old traditions, so the fun and spamming nature of The Islanders could easily attract them here. And with that nature, most inhabitants barely stayed homes, instead they practically lived at the Tropical Resort Bar of the Island Resort, a.k.a. The Bar.

On the southeast of Pedostan located its capital city Kohachi, or The Miracle City. It was named after the Miraculous jailbait Koharu, who could make wotas feel the *POP* in their pants once they saw her in bikini. This city acted as the gate to Pedostan, where it welcomed every visitor from all over the world. And traditionally, when Islanders came to the city, they would greet each other with the sign.

Kohachi was taken care of by the Invisible Bear, the one whose all trace of his existence was deleted by the bear himself. The fact that he often received private mails asking if he was serious about his GEI relationship with the Pedo-Master was quite famous throughout the city.

Travelers could have brief information on the current situation within Pedostan by lurking around Kohachi. For various occasions that proofs of lurkers were found at The Republic, especially a proof of one certain asshatz.

Although the Islanders were trying to detach themselves from the mainland, The Republic, many times they found themselves commuted back and forth between two regions. Wotas from The Republic, too, often visited this young region. However, time passed and things had changed. Many times the Islanders felt uncomfortable with these visitors and followed them back to the mainland to set things right. Eventually, the Islanders declared their independence from The Republic. Many had to choose whether to stay here or move back to The Republic and The Island lost many wotas during that time. Some groups of wotas still commuted between both regions, though, because they actually worked as a spy. Some could live fine at both places, but many had failed their missions and their identities were discovered. So they had to return home and never went to other region openly again.

With the love of drama, many times the Islanders traveled to places, undercover, seeking for some interesting drama to enjoy, or even caused one for their own entertainment. Though drama was interesting and fun for watching, sometimes it did cause problems among the Islanders too. In result, many had fled The Island to rejoin their fellow asshats in The Asshat Empire again. Finally there was only a small amount of the true Islanders remain on this spam paradise.

As time went by, the wotas on the Island had adapted themselves to suit The Island environment. Gradually the revolution process had completed and all inhabitants turned from wotas to bears. The Bears had been living happily for quite a while until the Stupid Invasion of Chicago IDOTs, the well-know shared-brain-cell Twins, the outcasts from almost every region THEY set foot on, due to THEIR stupidity. The Bears had fought against the IDOTs in that Stupid War for a while until the government body of Pedostan decided to exile these IDOTs from the region for eternity. The IDOTs wandered around the great Asshat Empire until they found one deserted Island at the end of the world and proclaimed it as THEIR property. Just as THEIR empty stupid head, THEY named THEIR land Empty Island. That Island was empty like its name, because its RULERS were stupid enough to believe that there was another world in the parallel dimension called The Real World, the fictional world which existed in THEIR empty heads ONLY!

The Island’s librarian, esm The Pedo Foog, made a collage of the story during the Stupid Invasion and published them in series under the name “TEH IDOTS: Chicago Twins -the greatest hits-”. Now there are 4 volumes of them. The complete book will be published soon.

Though The Bears had had many wars again asshats, they still welcomed many visitors and new comers. The Bears had a good relationship with Pimpwolf worshipers at The Isle of Pimpwolf, which was ruled by two Islanders known as The Ecchi Twins. There was a ferry traveling between these two Islands. This ferry was named IDOT, as it was taken from one of the IDOTs during THEIR visit to The Isle of Pimpwolf. The Bears had free access to every part of The Pimpwolf land with this ferry.

Recently, one notorious bear named Berryz Fields the Hammer Bear used his infamous hammer creating the new meeting place for The Bears on one island in Pedostan territorial waters, just off the Bikini Triangle. He named it Pedo Island, where everything involved one famous certain jailbait named Risako was Never Wrong. This Island had become famous among The Bears as their portal to the world. Every weekend, some Bears visited Pedo Island to celebrate The Armpiturday.

Many wotas from the Asshat Empire often visited this place, especially ones from the People’s Republic of assHat! idOt, who claimed that they were not a pedo, yet kept visiting that little island for all those pedo goods offered by The Bears. Some hypocrite asshats they were. However, The Bears found it very amusing for these hypocrite pedoes to get on The Bears’ case and created yet another drama out of it. What The Bears didn’t expect was one of them was that long gone IDOT. Apparently they set a journey off from THEIR Empty Island to the mainland again. After staying for a while in the Loony Bin City, THEY brought with THEM the Loony bin logic and spread it to those hypocrite pedoes.

However, not only asshats visited the Pedo Island. Travelers from one very friendly kingdom called International Kingdom were found in many parts of the island too. They often came for the loli goods provided by The Bears, or sometimes for some interesting funny products. The truth was revealed recently that one of the Kingdom rulers was a personal stalker to the great Pedo-Master Patachu.

This short history of Hello! Island is written to welcome its 2nd anniversary on this October 18th, which is only a month to go. Hope all Hello! Islanders will have a great ecchi loli spamming celebration this year.

Care Bear

P.S. I praise any of you who are patient enough to finish the whole thing XD